Friday, December 22, 2006

Free at Last! Free at Last... Etc.

I did it. I quit my job. I’m free! Unemployed, but free.

So this post will have to do double duty: a farewell to the parallel universe that has been my work place, and as a Merry-Christmas-Let’s-Kick-Major-Ass-Next-Year to all my blog pals.

But first:
Goodbye, Cruel Workstation.
For some reason, they’re in denial about my resignation. They keep talking about the projects “we” are going to work on next year. Whatever.

Goodbye, Mr. Almost Sexual Harassment (MASH). This man has been the bane of my existence since Day 1. He's ugly and short, with narrow, evil reptilian eyes. Incredibly, he imagines that he can use his high-pitched, slightly nasal voice to seduce the female members of staff. Which means he's stupid too. He got into the habit of saying my name every few minutes. I counted once: he said my name FIFTEEN times in half an hour. When I asked him to stop, he purred, "But why? It's such a beautiful name." But now he's in my past, Hallelujah! Take that, MASH!!

And then there's the Internet & Radio Choir From Hades.
For subjecting me to an endless parade of sing-alongs to the "music" of Michael Bolton, Shania Twain, Dolly Parton, Mariah Carey, Kenny G, and Celine Dion, here's my Christmas wish for you:

But now to be nice (stop barfing!). I've come across so many excellent people since I started doing this blog thing that I'm quite choked up right now just thinking about it (I know. I'm laughing too.) But seriously, have a good one, y'all, and Merry Christmas!

But just one quick questions before I go (I know, I blog like once a month and now all of a sudden I can't shut up). Anyway. Has anyone watched the Last King of Scotland? Did you notice that Forrest Whitaker was in blackface? How messed up is it when an African American wears blackface to play an African?

Ok, I'm done now. Merry Christmas!


Blogger Savage-No, I didn't quit said...

Is there some unwritten rule that one should quit a job at least once when one becomes a blogger?

Yeah, I saw The Last King of Scotland. I have a bootleg copy. the movie was in limited release. If you didn't live in NYC and L.A chances you wouldn't find it in a theater near you.

Anyways, it would have been quite jacked up having a light skinned Amin.

22 December, 2006 18:55  
Blogger baz said...

You used the deadly and dreaded Inverted Commas Of Derision (TM) on the choir? Few people can wield such a heavy weapon with such finesse and skill. I am proud of you.

You are the sixth to quit a job, by the way. Counting.

22 December, 2006 21:21  
Blogger Movie Buff said...

Good for you!
I wish I could quit mine!!

I am tired of these movies that are based in Africa but they get some African American, make them get some jacked up accent and then they play the role. Fuck that shit...

Merry Christmas and a FAB 2007!!!

22 December, 2006 21:47  
Blogger Movie Buff said...

And randomly....
Maybe the short dude had his testicles cut off and hence why he had a high pitched voice....

Im just saying!!!!!!!!!!

22 December, 2006 21:48  
Blogger Princess said...

Have a great holiday season!! I am in the process of job hunting and relocating so pretty soon I guess I will yet another blogger that decided to quit her job!!

22 December, 2006 22:08  
Anonymous acolyte said...

Congrats on moving on! Join the jobless bloggers line!
Seems they dont know what has hit them. As for MASH a good kick in the nuts would have been a good present good bye!
No more sounds from the District Focus crew for you, lucky gal!
I never watched the King of Scotland movie, but that blackface move sucked big time!
Do have a good holiday and blog once in a while for your fans!

23 December, 2006 11:03  
Anonymous country boy said...

ar u gettin married? i mean, ladies never quit & only quit 2 get married, so am misinformed. merry xmas kc

24 December, 2006 22:01  
Blogger Savage-No, I didn't quit said...

merry X-mas

25 December, 2006 17:50  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm not sure if congratulations should be in order but good for you girl! I know how it feels like to quit a crappy job. So now whats next? Happy holidays to you as well! Hammer those Tusker Malts vilivyo!


26 December, 2006 14:23  
Blogger Iwaya said...

i hope this does not mean you're going to do a runner like Jay and never post again because then...threatening emails will follow from me! yes, me! (you're supposed to be cringing!)

bad jobs are like bad hair days, seasonal and not to be tolerated.

27 December, 2006 21:48  
Blogger Iwaya said...

?....where did all that come from?

27 December, 2006 21:54  
Blogger Kenyanchick said...

I'm already enjoying this freedom business... I'm at a cafe, drinking capucchino and surfing.. this is the life!

Mr. Magoo: it's interesting, but several people I spoke to said the same thing about the black face stuff. And I hope you had a merry Christmas too!

Baz, Baz...You know I'm the yin to your yang. (Why do all my well-intentioned phrases come out sounding so vulgar? WHY?)

Oh MB - Give me a month. After unemployment, desperate moves and starvation, my quitting might not seem so cool. I'll keep you posted, though! And I'm sooo with you on that "jacked up accent" thing! Testicles cut off? All I'm saying about that is that I have the right to remain silent..

Princess - join the Unemployed Blogger's Club! Like a Ma3 there's always room for one more!

aco - ati District Focus? HAAA!! I have to blog, if only to get more exposed to your madness!

CB - oh, CB. We really have to cure you of this women & marriage fantasy. At least where KC is concerned. I'm deathly allergic.

Archer - but si I'll be seeing you at Walkabout soon?

Iwaya - Ha! I'm still around, although I'd love to get a threatening email from you. Send one immediately.

28 December, 2006 17:28  
Blogger modoathii said...

i don't know if i should say congrats, or oh no? naaaah!


but oh no! sasa we'll get your next blog after very long? how totally uncool.

iwaya, send a million of those threatening emails. and you hoax, we had a deal. what happened to that storo of ours? remember where you asked homies to contact you if they wanted a "sickening" wife?

remember this...

If you are looking for a submissive, skirt-wearing woman who agrees with everything you say, deeply yearns to have “your children,” and who’ll spend hours on her knees praying for your continued masculine leadership and wisdom...


28 December, 2006 18:24  
Blogger modoathii said...

and have a 'mary kiss my a**' and a happy new year

28 December, 2006 18:26  
Blogger Archer said...

A cold Tusker Malt awaits you at Walkabout and if you're lucky you might just get to witness Softa in Kenya (Sophie Ikenye) start a barfight!

28 December, 2006 21:15  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Happy holidays. Congrats on quitting the crappy job. May be joining you on the jobless que soon.

29 December, 2006 11:26  
Blogger minty said...

Tell me you made it fireworks and told them what was on your mind before you walked out, did you, did you?
Wish you a happy, healthy and wealthy 2007.

29 December, 2006 12:48  
Blogger Zack said...

A wonderful New Year gal!

31 December, 2006 19:55  
Blogger Nakeel said...

Happy New year gal. Hope the doors will open now.

03 January, 2007 13:00  
Blogger bankelele said...

happy new year & good luck

04 January, 2007 18:16  
Anonymous Barsawad said...

Of all the blogs I read, yours is the most hillarious; and at the same time very thought provoking.

Keep on writing whenever you can and do have a peacefull and happy 2007.

04 January, 2007 19:36  
Blogger Iwaya said...

@Modoathii: lemme go to your blog and explain...

04 January, 2007 20:34  
Anonymous Onkoba said...

Belated Christmas and New Year Greetings to all :-)

Congratulations on your liberation Kenyanchick. I won't say the sky is the limit, cos in reality, there are no limits; man did pass the sky to reach the moon...

Proverb: Never close a door unless there is another open.

Corollary: Closed doors keep the noise, insects, unwanted people and the fear of succeeding out.

- Mzee Ndizi Wamatoke

05 January, 2007 10:27  
Blogger Degstar said...

so now u've diengaged from the matrix, eeh? unemployment is not for the faint of heart as u will sooon discover. sure u can blog all day but damn if dat dont give u sore wrists, an aching back an stitches from all the fun u gon have, i mean who would want dat?
have a great year Child, we oughta do dat Rolex thingy this year, what with ur job situation n all, u got d time baby.

08 January, 2007 20:50  
Anonymous mdkims said...

forest whittaker ... watched him at oprah ...said he learnt swa and traced his african roots to somewhere in guinea ... i will watch the movie and see if i have an opinion to make

10 January, 2007 16:26  
Blogger Lovely Amphibian said...

eh! you too?

15 January, 2007 19:22  
Blogger The Rendezvous said...

The last king of scotland is a hilarious movie.The idea that africans are "gruesome" must come to an end.

The man is resting in peace..

16 January, 2007 16:55  
Anonymous m said...

That cat is asking for it in more ways than one ...

As for quitting -- look at it this way -- at least Kibaki and his three bears can say that there are now 500,001 jobs

19 January, 2007 01:02  
Blogger Prousette said...

Happy New year KC.

Just wondering what did they do to the actor's face to make it black kiwi...?

19 January, 2007 15:22  
Blogger Savage-No, I didn't quit said...

Lakini Babe seriously, you need to blog.

02 February, 2007 08:36  
Anonymous degstar said...

seriously Sista,
u need to get back up inhere already, i cant take the withdrawal much longer.

02 February, 2007 21:06  
Blogger coldtusker said...

archer... aaiiii... the real coldtusker is in da house...

OK, sounds lame but LOL... KC... u rock... now about that thing about being on your knees... gets me thiking I need to apply...

05 February, 2007 22:10  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Still waiting on guide vol.2....whats up with that leaving us hanging?? I love your blogs

05 February, 2007 23:11  

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